Saturday, August 30, 2008

NOT SURE WHAT THE HECK I AM DOING...

This getting out the door to exercice is hard... Since Quebec City half-marathon I am in a coma like state.... I felt really crappy Thursday and Friday, some sort of start of cold and now that it has seem to pass. I just can't motivate myself to go out the door. For the last 3 days I got dressed for a bike ride just to sit on the couch all day... sigh. We'll see what happens today.... but I am not hopeful. Not even the thought of sucking at my next sprint tri is kicking me in the butt.
I don't think I speak of my personal life very often on this blog, as I like to be this always happy person that I know I can be. But for the last week I can't shake this unhapiness. I have now been looking for a job since January and finished my Ph.D. since April and haven't found anything. Niet. Nil. Nothing. The worse is that I have only been called on 1 interview and just receive a negative reply on Wednesday. It is starting to affect the way I see myself, and all the sacrifices I made to finish this damn Ph.D. and then realise I have nothing in front of me??? This is not fair. I just can't understand why this is so hard....
Plus my foot/ankle is totally wack!

9 comments:

Laurel said...

Oh Sonia, I am so sorry.
I can totally relate. since we moved here I have been searching for a job and have sent out 12 resumes and have only heard back from ONE place to tell me they received it and would contact me if they wanted more info...I've been totally bummed too and it's affecting my perceptions as well.

I think it's also affecting my motivation to train as well. It sort of rubs off on everything.

I guess there is nothing to do but keep on looking. Times are tough all around right now. Keep your head up!

J~Mom said...

That is hard!! I hope that you find a job soon! (((HUGS)))

Arcane said...

Don't take the rejection as a reflection of who you are. Everyone gets rejected for a job at one point in their career so consider it a rite of passage. Just keep looking and try and learn something new each day about job searching/interviewing or improving your resume. Hopefully something will come up soon. Good luck!

BeachRunner said...

That is tough. But try to stay positive. You WILL find a great job eventually. Don't lose your confidence.

She Who Makes Waves said...

It's O.K. to express how you feel! We all have our down times and it does not help keeping it concealed. You have all us blog friends on your side wishing you strength to deal with all you are experiencing in life right now! Best wishes and a big hug!

TNTcoach Ken said...

Don't get down on yourself. On edoor closes and another opens.

Sonia said...

Thanks everybody, I felt really down but I will try to deal with it a better way than what I was doing right now (eating crap and sitting on the couch!!)

Fran: this sentence really stucks with me "Don't take the rejection as a reflection of who you are" thanks for posting this. It is hard not to but I know that with interviewing 1200 people they had lots of choices...

Thanks again ya'll ;-)

yumke said...

You'll get there, just keep on trying! I think running lessons come over to life..

Runner Leana said...

I'm sorry to hear you are feeling down about things. The right thing will come your way, I know it. I felt the same way when I was trying to move from Texas to Calgary and it was really disappointing. Are you sure you don't want to come to Calgary? We can race tris together!